Skinny cooks can't be trusted...

Beer is my friend

Fri, 08 Jan 2010 03:18:00 GMT

Today was the first truly crappy day of the year:
   I was attacked by my coffee. (White shirt, natch)
   I missed the fire drill (I'm a floor marshal) (not my fault, it didn't go off in my part of the building, they're checking to find out why)
   My computer had catastrophic crash (didn't even get the screen o'death, it just shut down)
   While I was in a very specialized program, that the head of IS had to get me back into. After he came back from his off-site meeting.
   What I was doing was very time-sensitive and because I was locked out of the program without signing off correctly nobody else could get in.
  And I started coughing, again.

Beer is my friend.

Um - No.

Wed, 06 Jan 2010 05:56:20 GMT

It's too bleeding late, I can't sleep and My Husband is sick, again.

He says it just a version of the head-cold I had last week but I don't trust it. I've been on this ride before. If he's not better by the end of the week, I'm dragging him to see our PC on Monday. There will be no hospital stays this year, not if I can help it.

2009

Fri, 01 Jan 2010 18:28:18 GMT

It's done, it's over. You were an inconsiderate jerk! I never want to see you again!

Your clothes? I gave them to Goodwill. The rest of your stuff is in the dumpster.

I got a restraining order yesterday, so you can't call me, email me, write me or come within 200 feet of me.

Now go and never darken my life again..

Long time no post

Sat, 26 Dec 2009 00:39:37 GMT

Yes, I know it's been 7 weeks since my last post. Life has just been really insane (not bad, no trips to the hospital, just busy). I've also had the head cold from hell for the past 4 weeks and still haven't gotten rid of it. Bleh.
Christmas has been rather cookery. New pots and pans, cookie sheets and a beer stein. (Yes, a real German stein)
But the whole reason for this post. I'm doing down stairs, on our new laptop, on our new wireless network. Yes, we are now wired for the 21st century.
We started a new christmas tradition this year: we went to the movies. We saw Sherlock Holmes. No spoilers, just "dissipate two-fisted Holmes for the WIN" to quote My Husband.

A glorious Sol Invictus to you all.

Selfish Happiness

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 19:09:34 GMT

Fort Hood shooting.

My friend Omar is okay!! I just got an email from him, the 128th was no where near the shooting! Yeah!!!!

What I do feel is sad for the families that lost loved ones and for the shooter. They all need love and care.

Attention, please

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 22:50:51 GMT

Dear Universe:
                    I want a double order of chinese bbq quesadillas, re-fried beans and white rice from Chinos, BEER and a million dollars in large unmarked bills.

                  Sincerely,
                                Cynthia

Seasons

Mon, 26 Oct 2009 14:32:15 GMT

It's winter.
I know what the calender says: it says it's fall. But in our house, it's winter. As of this morning My Husband has lost his verbal skills. Which will stay lost until he's had at least one full cup of coffee. This trend will continue until the sun starts getting up before we leave the house and it stops being cold (anything below 70 in the morning).

Safety Notice

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 14:33:46 GMT

When peeling carrots, it is important to remember not to peel your thumb.

Stereotypes

Fri, 09 Oct 2009 14:39:01 GMT

After four years of working here I managed to completely turn around what people thought about me. Most of the time when people come into my office I'm listening to music through my earbuds. But since my office mate has left, I've been playing music through my computer speakers with the door closed. My manager came in yesterday, stopped dead and asked " What is that?!?" "Undead West." I said not looking up. "What is that?" "Cowboy Punk" I said turning to look at her and seeing a sightly stunned look on her face. "Is that the name of the band?" "No, it the style." "I thought you listened to classic*, that's what you were listening to last time I was in here." "I listen to a lot of stuff." (it changed to Warrant's April 2031) "I just never expected you to listen to stuff like that." (my phone rang at that moment and she left)
I'm not sure what she meant but "stuff like that" but it's always nice to keep them guessing.

*I'm pretty sure she meant classical, because the last time she was in I was listening to Bach's Toccata in D minor.

Gravity is a harsh mistress

Thu, 08 Oct 2009 14:48:50 GMT

My Huband fell yesterday.
He's mostly okay, just sore and achy. But his leg has been giving him a lot more pain lately. I'm taking it as a hopeful sign that the nerve is starting to decompress but he's still failing the reflex test.

sigh

Meh.

Wed, 07 Oct 2009 19:54:12 GMT

I'm not sure what's been wrong with me lately. I've had some really interesting thing happen and some great new recipes but I'm just meh.

Book vs Kindle

Tue, 29 Sep 2009 23:00:04 GMT

10 reasons why a book is better than a Kindle

1. A book doesn’t need a battery

2. You can take a bath with a book

3. You can’t shove a Kindle in your back pocket

4. You can’t kill a bug with a Kindle

5. You can’t throw a Kindle at your spouse when their being silly

6. You can’t throw a Kindle across the room because the writing/story sucks

7. No new book smell

8. No old book smell

9. No finding that rare OOP edition that was the cause of the lawsuit

10. There’s no joy of anticipation from opening a cover of a new book.

Cool

Wed, 09 Sep 2009 14:34:42 GMT

Today's date is 09-09-09.

So glad not us

Thu, 03 Sep 2009 19:18:58 GMT

As we were driving out of our townhouse complex this morning, we saw a line of cops walking in. About a dozen, all armed, all with vests and the guy at the end of the line had a door breaker. At 6:30 am, somebody was going to have a very bad day. And their neighbors, too.

Good news: the hematoma has finally gone away.
Bad news: it could take 6 to 8 months before the nerves come out of shock.
Good news: for the first time, in I can't remember how long, I'm under 180.
Bad news: didn't get to send my resume off last night because of a catastrophic hard drive failure.

Signs and Portents

Wed, 02 Sep 2009 19:25:44 GMT

Have you ever had an omen? I think I just did.
They are still wrangling over the state budget (which my agency depends on heavily) and some other things going on in my department made me go look at the job listings. The first one that popped up is for a company that a girl friend works for that is very stable. I meet or exceed all the requirements and it's $2.50 more an hour than I make now. She gave me the number of woman I need to speak to, which is one number off from the number I grew up with. And to top it all off, it's within walking distance from my house.
I'm sending in my resume tonight.

Things I never expected

Wed, 05 Aug 2009 16:30:09 GMT

Okay, I know I haven't posted in awhile. It's been. . .busy.
But, I just wrote "Black light and Germjuice for hand-washing training". That is possibly the oddest thing I've ever written.

500 days of Summer and public embarrassment

Wed, 01 Jul 2009 19:12:53 GMT

We got tickets to go see "500 days of Summer" last night. It wasn't what I was expecting and I liked it more than I thought I would. I can't really describe it, other than what the opening narration says, "This a story about love, however it is not a love story."
Go see it, it's really funny and a nice way to spend 90 minutes of your life.

As to the public embarrassment: on leaving the theater we got give tickets to another sneak. Cool, right? I turned the ticket over to see what the movie was and said:

SQUEE!!

Loudly. In the middle of the theater lobby. In front of people, I didn't know.
Now the ticket is to see "Julia&Julie", a movie I have been waiting over a year for. But that's still no reason to squee in public.

Further adventures in lunch

Tue, 30 Jun 2009 15:21:41 GMT

Yesterday, I had just taken my lunch out of the microwave, when the woman* (not Miss Icantcook) waiting for the microwave said:

You shouldn’t be eating that. You don’t know what’s in it.

Excuse me?

Your lunch, you don’t know what’s in it.

Uh, yes I do.

Did you make it? (she puts her frozen dinner in the microwave)

Yes.

Opening some cans isn’t cooking.**

(I look down at my lunch, which is a red sauce with fusilli)

I didn’t use cans.

Really, Pizza hut? (snide tone)

No, I started with 3 pounds of plum tomatoes and went from there.

(She stares at me)

From Scratch? (totally disbelieving tone)

Yes and its getting cold. (I left to eat)

What is it with people? She was eating a frozen dinner and sneering at my brought from home? Yes, I know what is in it, I have to. It had 100mg of sodium, 300 calories per that serving and I have no idea how much fat. Its the first two, I need to worry about.

Is it just me or do other people have these problems?

*I have never seen her at the office before, but I know she works for HS. That's what her badge said and it was still shiny.
**Depends on the can and what you are doing.

Home

Mon, 29 Jun 2009 22:05:13 GMT

He’s home.

For the first time in months, neither one of us needed pills to sleep, the right weight, the right noises and the bed. There were a lot of silences this weekend. I didn’t realize how much of our time together is spent in silence until it wasn’t there. I’m not saying it was silent; it’s the noises that define the silence; breathing, pages turning, the creak of the floor, all these are the silences that make us.

There was also much personally silliness, that for reasons of tact, TMI and the FCC I won’t post here. : )

Tomorrow: the further adventures in lunch.

Squee!!! part 2

Mon, 22 Jun 2009 02:02:58 GMT

He's coming home, he's coming home!!!!!

It's not until next weekend, because the PT's want him to practice the stairs a little more to make sure he can catch himself when the leg buckles on him. Notice it's when not if the leg buckles. It's given on him several times on him in practice at therapy. But, that withstanding:

He's coming home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lost but maybe not forgotten

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 17:27:58 GMT

This came up because of a discussion from someone on my flist. When I was typing it up for him I realized My Husband can never have this, in this manner, ever again. This is most definitely not low sodium. I am going to need to do some serious reworking of this recipe.

Smoked Tea Eggs

From Treasures of our Past by the Phoenix Buddhist Friendship Association

8 eggs

3 tbsps loose black tea (I like Russian Caravan)

2 tbsps soy sauce

1 tbsp coarse salt

1 whole star anise

Water

Simmer eggs for 15 minutes. Let eggs cool, then gently crack shell with the back of a spoon until the shell is full of fine cracks, but do not remove the shell. Return eggs to pan. Add 4 cups of water, tea, soy, salt and star anise. Heat to simmering and cook, on low heat for 1 hour. Cool and chill the eggs in the liquid for at least 8 hours or up to 2 days. Shell eggs before serving.

Low sodium salad

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 17:59:45 GMT

Asian Spinach & Shrimp Salad

1 tsp of ground ginger

3 tbsps of rice wine vinegar

2 tbsps of low sodium soy sauce

2 tbsps of water

1 tbsp of sesame oil

10 oz of fresh spinach – cleaned, washed and stems removed

1 lb of shrimp – cleaned, cooked and chilled (31-40 work very well)

1 cup of bean sprouts – fresh or canned (I prefer fresh)

1 cup of snow peas – cut in half

1 red bell pepper- cut into strips

1 yellow pepper – cut into strips

Cashews – unsalted (optional)

Mix ginger, vinegar, soy sauce, water and oil together with a whisk until frothy. Let rest for about 15-30 minutes at room temperature to let the flavors blend.

Assemble the salad in this order: spinach, shrimp, bean sprouts, snow peas and bell peppers. Drizzle with dressing and serve. Garish with cashews if desired

Makes 8, 2 cup servings.

120 calories, 260 mg of sodium per serving.

Adventures in Lunch

Wed, 17 Jun 2009 20:11:08 GMT

I ran into Miss “Icantcook” again. My lunch was later than usual because of a meeting, so I got to see what she eats.

What do you have for lunch today?

Salad, what are you having?

Lean Cuisine Panini, (watches as I pull containers out of my lunch bag) what kind of salad?

Mixed spring greens with salmon, strawberries, avocado, pecans and a balsamic vingerette. (Assembled as we were talking)

Did you make all that?

No, I bought all the parts and put it together.

I wish I could do that.

Um, it’s not cooking. Other than the salmon and I did that in the microwave.

I still couldn’t do that. It’s cooking.

????????????????????? (her lunch was ready and I escaped)

As near as I can tell, she’s totally convinced herself that she cannot cook and is incapable of learning how to cook.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?

Mon, 15 Jun 2009 18:41:24 GMT

Can somebody tell me when cooking got hard? When it became impossible for people to do??

This was the third time, in as many working days, that someone said how much they enjoyed smelling my lunches re-heat. ( I don't mind that, the rest of this I do mind)

That asked me what it was?

Leftovers.

Where I got them from?

Dinner last night.

What restaurant did I go to?

None, I made it.

YOU MADE it?!?

(it being chicken curry, shrimp with jerk fried rice and shrimp scampi)

Scampi is really easy.

Oh, no I don’t cook. It’s too hard.

Scampi is just butter, olive oil, garlic, shrimp and pasta.

Oh, that’s too hard to do.

Uh, boiling water is too hard?

I don’t know how to make it.

Follow the recipe in the cookbook.

I don’t the patience.

You have a masters in early child development and you don’t have the patience?!?

I can’t do it. It’s too hard.

When the$#@& did this happen? Is this a plot by Big Food to keep us docile and dumb, by taking away our ability to create nourishment for ourselves?

Soylent green is people!!

Quail under cardboard

Sat, 06 Jun 2009 03:48:47 GMT

My Husband and I picked up his son and went back to my in-laws. My stepson is staying there so he can be with his dad.
We were working on the computer trying to find a new ring tone for my MiL (something she can hear), when my FiL came in with his hand cupped. With my FiL that usually means that he has hurt himself somehow. In this case however he had a baby quail that had wandered in the garage. He thinks that the parents abandoned it (I think it zigged when the parents zagged). It's got feathers and the cutest stubby wings. It can walk and cheep. We think it's about 1-2 weeks old. My MiL called my SiL that raises chickens. She gave her some advice: feed it non-medicated game bird starter, keep it warn (a 40 watt bulb = 100 degrees) and give it water in something deep enough to drink out of but shallow enough to keep it from drowning.
You would think that my stepson would the one interested in the chick but its my MiL that we have to keep chasing away from the box and make her leave the poor bird alone.

hawklady

do you have any suggestions?